Finding Home
by Queen Clutzilla
Summary: I really don't know how to summerise this but, it is good and I think you should read it. Riarkle. (Maybe a slow burn...who knows)


Six months. Six months since Riley and Lucas' relationship started. Six months of getting used to the relationship and she still felt that kind of awkward, "am I going to mess up" feeling. She had this uncomfortable bubble that sat in the pit of her stomach, as if she was doing something wrong or he didn't like her anymore. In her mind, she knew all these things were false but, that uncomfortable bubble remained. She was used to pining over him. Him being right out of her grasp but knowing he reciprocated her feelings. Being friends with mutual romantic feelings. But once it actually happened, once she finally reached the place she's been yearning to be since Maya pushed her onto his lap that one day on the subway, it felt wrong. She felt like when you go to the beach and it's absolutely beautiful but, then you left your sunscreen at home and get a sunburn, or go swimming in the ocean and get sand in your bathing suit. It was that feeling of wanting to be comfortable and happy and warm but, you end up feeling uncomfortable and like you just want to go home.

What she couldn't figure out was, when it comes to a person, what is home? Her mom and dad and Auggie were home but that's different, they're her family, a different type of home. Maya was home, yet again a different type of home. She thought Lucas would be that special type of home but, he wasn't. And that both confused her and scared her. Maybe it would come in time. Just a little bit more time and Lucas would be her special type of home. Just a little more time, right?

* * *

One Tuesday lunch, the unexpected happened: Smackle broke up with Farkle. To the outside world, it seemed completely out of the blue but, to Farkle, well he knew it was just a matter of time before this happened. What he didn't expect was the way Smackle went about it. It was loud and emotional, very unlike Smackle, the girl who some people still somewhat suspected her to be a robot-human hybrid of some sort.

In the middle of lunch, Riley had just said something was funny to the entire group. As they were all settling down from their fits of giggles and chuckles, Smackle looked over at Farkle, who was still gazing at Riley as her smile widened with pride and joy because she brought a bit of happiness to her friends. There was a glimmer in Farkle's eyes as he looked at her, a glimmer that she had never seen him give her, his girlfriend. This isn't the first time she's noticed it. It's gone on for months, years even but, Smackle didn't say anything about it. The glances and the gazes, and the star-struck like compliments and that damn glimmer, they were all normal, everyday happenings. But it was the straw that broke the camel's back when Farkle's face significantly dropped as Lucas took Riley's hand and held it securely in his own. That is what broke the lock that held back Smackle's emotions. It was the small sinking of rejection, the punch of betrayal but most importantly, it was the heat of anger.

She abruptly stood up, her tray tightly gripped in her hands, "I'm done!" She yelled, causing everyone in the cafeteria to turn and look at them.

"Smackle, if you're finished eating, you don't have to announce it to the whole room." Zay joked inncocently.

This only infuriated Smackle more, "Not with my food! With you!" She aimed her words at Farkle who sat there looking up at her with wide eyes, "I can't take this anymore! It's not fair to me! How dare you do this to me! I may seem emotionless at times but, they're there! I'm human, I have emotions!" She basically screamed. Some people in the lunchroom tried not to stare, while others just watched, looking like they desperately wanted to pull out their phones to record it or manifest a bucket of popcorn to accompany the show.

"Issadora, do you think we could do this somewhere else? And quieter?" Farkle asked quietly but sternly.

Her blood was boiling over, she was seeing red, "No Farkle! We can't! We're done! Over!" She paused to catch her breath, "but you already knew that, didn't you. You've known for a while now that I'm not the one you want to be with…" she said in a softer tone.

Farkle just stared at her, wide eyed and not knowing what to say because, she was right. It was cruel of him to not end it when he first realised it but, he just couldn't do it. There was no rhyme or reason. He just couldn't break up with Smackle. Maybe it's because then, he true emotions might become evident. He looked down and sucked in his breath before looking back up to his anger ridden now ex-girlfriend, "I'm sorry." He spoke softly.

"Yeah, me too." She spat with a hint of sadness behind her sharp tone, "Me too, Farkle." She went to turn and walk away from the group but not before sending a quick glare over to Riley. She felt guilty about that one. It wasn't her fault, she shouldn't be mad at her in the slightest bit. It wasn't her fault that her ex-boyfriend never truly got over her. It wasn't her fault that she was the sun that Farkle's entire life revolves around. She didn't lead him on or flirt with him in anyway. Riley just acted like Riley and it's not her fault that Farkle was in love with her. It wasn't her fault but Issadora Smackle couldn't help but be angry at the girl who stole her boyfriend just by being herself.

The room was silent. You could hear a pin drop on a pile of hay it was so quiet. Every eye in the small group of friends was pinned on Farkle, waiting for him to say something, anything. Make a sound at the very least or even get up and walk away. But he didn't. He just opened his pudding cup and started to eat the contents.

It was Riley that wound up standing up and leaving, without saying anything. Not even a gentle wave. Nothing. And that's because if she said anything or looked at her friends' faces she knew she would burst into tears. As quickly as it was thrown, she felt Smackle's glare deep in her soul. She felt the hatred from the girl she called her friend seep into her heart. As she walked the halls, she racked her brain, trying to figure what she did to deserve that much hatred from the girl who recently learned how to feel and how to accept love and friendship.

"What did I do wrong?" She asked herself, not thinking anyone was around.

"Riley? Are you okay?" Her dad's concerned voice jolted her out of her head and back into reality. She had subconsciously walked her her dad's classroom.

Tears welled up in her eyes, "Daddy am I a bad person?"

Corey Matthews was taken aback by his daughter's question. He went over and pulled her into a hug, "No, Sweetheart. Of course not. Why would you think something like that?"

Riley couldn't answer. She just sobbed as her father held her tighter, his face riddled with concern and confusion. Why would his precious angel who inevitably makes everyone smile, think she's a bad person?

She cried and cried and cried, not knowing what to say or how to explain what happened. And to be quite honest, she didn't even know what happened. All she knew is that Smackle gave her a look so full of hatred that the image will be burned into Riley's mind for the rest of her life.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't even realised that the bell had rung and she needed to get to class. Her father pulled her out of of his embrace, "Time for class." She nodded sadly in response and went to walk out the door. "Riley?" Her father chimed causing her to face him again, "This is your class."

"Oh, right." she gave him a small, sad Riley, smile then sat down in her normal seat. She sat up and stared straight, willing the tears not to fall as the rest of the class, and her friends, filed into the classroom.

Once Maya sat down in her seat behind Riley. She looked at the back of her best friend's head with concern. She tapped on Riley's shoulder, "Riley? Honey, are you okay?"

Riley just continued to stare ahead. She didn't want to cry, not in class. And talking would lead to crying.

Farkle glanced over at Riley from his seat, seeing that she had her serious mask on. The mask that prevented her from unleashing her true emotions. He then glanced behind him to see an empty desk.

"Has anyone seen Smackle?" Mr. Matthews questioned the class.

There was a period of silence before Farkle raised his hand and spoke, "Issadora wasn't feeling well so her aunt came and picked her up."

As soon as Farkle finished speaking, Riley placed her head down against her hands that were folded on her desk. _What did I do? What did I say? Smackle never misses class, no matter how terrible she feels. What did I do?_ Riley shamed herself in her head for something that she didn't do. Or rather didn't mean to do. She tried making up reasons that Smackle would be upset with her, none of the reasons making any sense at all.

Farkle stared at Riley's back as it rose and fell with her heavy breaths. He knew that she was blaming herself and it killed him inside. Watching her be in pain was the worst thing in the world. That being said, he still participated in class but not to the same degree or with as much enthusiasm as usual. He was mostly distracted on how Riley kept her head down, stuck in her thoughts. Guilt was eating away his insides. If he had just broken up with Smackle when he realised that his love for Riley was never just platonic, Smackle wouldn't have exploded and Riley wouldn't be miserable. This was his fault and he didn't know how to fix it without confessing his feelings. All of the options he could see move forward looked awful and painful. So he stayed quiet and waited it for it to work itself out…

 **Hiya! I didn't really know how to end this so I apologise if it's a little abrupt. I know that this fandom is kind of sort of outdated but it still holds a very permanent place in my heart. I have had this story idea in my head for the longest time and I just...I just decided to write it. More to come soon. I do not own GMW, obviously or else it would still be running Riarkle would have been endgame (Even though we all know that if it wasn't cancelled they were so going to be canonly endgame.) Thank you for reading! I hope you stay tuned for the next chapters.**


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